For Caleb Nile Yoder born in silence 4-2-10

 

How do you say goodbye before you’ve even said hello?

How do you grieve someone that you hardly even got to know?

My heart is broken don’t know if it will ever mend;

My dream was stolen tell me how do I begin again?

Born in Silence I held you in my arms and cried;

I don’t understand this but God knows I have tried

Is this a nightmare or is this my reality?

Return to Zero is all I see

My arms are aching for a child I can never hold

My head is filling with a story I have never told;

I long to reach out as I wish on a distant star

For just one moment to be right where you are.

Born in Silence I held you in my arms and cried;

I don’t understand this but God knows I have tried.

Is this a nightmare or is this my reality?

Return to Zero is all I see

If there’s one thing I want you to know

It’s here and there I love you so.

I see you sleeping on a cloud

I’ll say your name and say it loud.

Born in Silence I held you in my arms and cried;

I don’t understand this but God knows I have tried.

Is this a nightmare or is this my reality?

Return to Zero is all I see…

I have never been able to write out the story of my son Caleb’s stillbirth. I have tried but I can only get so far and then I cannot go on. I can talk about it but to write it seems so much more permanent. So instead I wrote this song that tries and I believe does capture the raw emotion of a mother who has had a stillbirth. God Bless.

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